Dealing with angry customers can be one of the most challenging parts of customer service – but mastering it can turn angry customers into loyal ones.
Preparation is key for turning negative situations into positive ones and ensuring slight complaints don’t escalate into blowups.
Interacting with angry customers requires patience, empathy, and a strategic approach, whether face-to-face, over the phone, email, or live chat.
This guide provides actionable steps for handling angry customers across multiple channels. It includes tips for managing your emotions and defusing difficult situations effectively, ensuring you can turn a negative situation into a positive customer experience.
Table of Contents
- Getting to the root of customer frustration
- The importance of helping angry customers
- Handling angry customers face-to-face
- Handling angry customers over the phone
- Handling angry customers through email
- Handling angry customers on live chat
- Keeping your cool when things get heated
- Reframing the conversation: making conflict suck less
- Key phrases & scripts for diffusing tension
- Turning a crappy situation into a positive experience
1. Getting to the Root of Customer Frustration
Successfully managing frustrated customers requires a solid understanding of their frustration’s root causes. You have to recognize early warning signs to ensure minor issues don’t turn into significant ordeals.
What Makes Customers Angry
Customers can become angry due to various issues, from service-related issues to product defects.
The source of anger varies but is typically caused by one of these:
1) Buggy or Defective Products
One of the quickest ways to frustrate customers is to fail to meet their expectations about the function or quality of your product. This is especially true if the customer discovers a product issue early on in the customer journey.
Tips:
- Comb through customer support tickets to see which keywords come up the most.
- Sort tickets into categories based on what part of the product or service needs to be fixed.
- Set a roadmap with a realistic timeline to improve those areas and resolve recurring issues.
2) Crappy Customer Service
Customers expect high-quality support and fast responses. Long response times allow customers’ frustration to build, creating a bigger problem for you to handle. Failure to communicate effectively with them is a surefire way to frustrate them.
Tips:
- Implement a 90-day training program for customer service reps.
- Implement an All-Hands Support program to decrease wait times and give everyone in the company insight into customer needs.
- Distribute CSAT or NPS surveys regularly to get feedback directly from customers. Analyze this feedback to see where your customer service needs improvement.
3) Mistakes
Mistakes happen — sometimes they’re in your control, and sometimes not. Whether the root cause is a supply chain issue or an email lost in the shuffle, customers see inconvenienced or let down.
Tips:
- Regularly walk through processes (e.g., onboarding and refunds) to put yourself in your customers’ shoes.
- Test critical contact points and standard operating procedures to understand the customer experience.
- Create a communications best practices guide to give support reps a framework for communicating with empathy and kindness in all situations.
Recognizing Signs Of Frustration
Recognizing signs of a frustrated customer enables you to provide timely and effective support, which can help defuse their growing frustration. Frustration can be detected through verbal and nonverbal cues, requiring active listening and a compassionate mindset.
- Verbal Cues: Tone of voice changes, escalating language, negative feedback.
- Nonverbal cues: Body language, delayed responses or going dark (not responding), and irritable responses.
If you witness any of these things with customers, it’s a red flag that they might be frustrated, and you should take action immediately.
2. The Importance Of Helping Angry Customers
Angry customers are at risk of churning and switching to a competitor, so you must have a plan for identifying these customers and engaging them effectively.
1) Retention
Research shows that 32% of customers would stop doing business with a brand after one bad experience. Ignoring angry customers is like not paying attention to a warning light on your car’s dashboard. If you don’t address the warning signal, it can snowball into a much larger and more expensive issue.
Likewise, when frustrated customers are left without support, their frustration can intensify over time. The first sign of frustration should trigger you to take action. The more you identify and fix points of frustration, the more customers you’ll retain, and the faster your business will grow.
2) Positive Feedback
Effectively handling a customer complaint can transform a negative situation into a positive experience and even increase customer loyalty. This concept is known as the service recovery paradox.
The idea behind the service recovery paradox is that a customer who encounters and then experiences a well-resolved service issue often becomes more loyal to the brand than if they had never encountered a problem in the first place.
This “paradox” occurs because a well-managed resolution demonstrates a brand’s commitment to customer satisfaction, leaving the customer feeling more valued and understood.
Addressing and resolving customer complaints effectively can lead to positive feedback from the customer and may even inspire them to share their good experience with others. This helps rebuild trust with the individual customer and encourages word-of-mouth recommendations, enhancing the brand’s reputation and attracting new customers.
3) Improve Systematic Issues
As the saying goes, “Feedback is a gift.” Working with frustrated customers to resolve their complaints provides valuable insight into areas where your product or service might need improvement. Often, systematic issues or overlooked gaps only come to light when customers take the time to share their experiences.
By addressing these issues directly, you can resolve the individual complaint and also refine the overall experience for other customers, reducing the potential for future frustrations.
3. Handling Angry Customers Face-to-Face
In-person interactions bring extra intensity, as both tone of voice and body language are immediately present. Face-to-face scenarios also remove some protective barriers in digital or phone interactions, making handling these encounters with care essential to avoid misunderstanding and further escalation.
When Face-To-Face, Start With This
Focus on non-verbal communication (like body language), staying calm, and listening actively to the customer’s concerns. Repeat or summarize their concerns so they know you’re listening.
1) Emotional Tip
Control your breathing and maintain open, neutral body language to show empathy without escalating the situation. Avoid defensive body language like crossed arms, as this can come off as dismissive. Instead, use open gestures to show your willingness to engage and resolve the issue.
⚡Example
Imagine a customer is visibly frustrated and upset in a retail store due to a long return line – how can you calm them down and resolve their issue?
- First, let them speak. In a heated moment, let them vent their frustrations without interrupting them.
- Remain calm even if the customer is not.
- Practice active listening and avoid aggressive or offensive body language, which will only escalate the situation.
- Summarize their complaints so they know you’re listening.
In this scenario, your controlled response helps diffuse the situation and bring the conversation back to a place where a resolution can be found.
4. Handling Angry Customers Over The Phone
Phone interactions lack visual cues like body language and gestures, so tone of voice is the primary way to convey empathy, patience, and professionalism. How you respond on the phone can drastically influence the customer’s mood and the conversation’s outcome.
When On The Phone, Start With This
Use active listening techniques to show the customer you’re engaged and want to resolve their issue. Verbal nods, like saying “I understand” or “I can see how that would be frustrating,” show you’re fully present and understand their concerns.
1) Emotional Tip
Remain patient and allow the customer to vent if needed; don’t talk over them. Frustration often decreases when the customer feels heard and understood. Once they’ve expressed their concerns, calmly summarize their main points to confirm you understand everything. This also reassures the customer that you’re actively listening.
⚡Example
Imagine a customer calling in about a billing issue. They’re frustrated and feel as if they’ve been over-charged. What’s the best path forward?
- Start by listening attentively.
- Use affirming phrases to show empathy, such as, “I understand how unexpected charges can be frustrating.”
- Once they’ve finished, recap their primary concern.
This approach validates the customer’s feelings. A calm and structured response can also guide the conversation toward a resolution without letting emotions take over.
5. Handling Angry Customers Through Email
Written communication lacks the tone of voice and body language cues that help convey emotions and intent, so it’s easy for these exchanges to be misunderstood or come across as impersonal.
Without these visual or auditory signals, written messages can come across as blunt or negative, making it essential to choose the right words when writing.
When Using Email, Start With This
Start with a compassionate statement, acknowledge the customer’s concern, and outline clear steps for resolution. Use clear, empathetic language to create a warmer, more personalized tone.
1) Emotional Tip
Pause and review your email before sending it to ensure it doesn’t sound dismissive or defensive.
⚡️Example
Imagine a customer sending an angry email about a delayed shipment. How do you craft a response that shows understanding and offers a solution?
- Open with a polite acknowledgment.
- Show empathy and apologize sincerely.
- Briefly explain the cause of the issue.
- Provide a solution.
- Reassure and thank the customer.
Following these steps shows the customer you understand the problem and take ownership of it.
Avoid excessive back-and-forth
Email interactions can often last several days or weeks, especially when the issue involves complex details, feedback, or decision-making. Each reply might even include additional details or questions. This back-and-forth can turn simple inquiries into long-running and difficult customer experiences.
At this point, the best path forward might be jumping on a phone call to hash out the details in real time. Shifting to a phone call can expedite resolutions and prevent further frustration.
6. Handling Angry Customers On Live Chat
Unlike emails, which have more flexibility in response times, live chat inherently creates a high expectation for immediate support. To meet these expectations, support reps must be well-versed in the company’s products, policies, and troubleshooting strategies to provide fast and accurate responses.
With Live Chat, Start With This
Quickly acknowledge the customer’s frustration and aim to resolve it in as few messages as possible. Maintain a friendly and professional tone to reassure the customer and keep the conversation efficient and positive.
1) Emotional Tip
Stay calm and avoid mirroring the customer’s intensity. Take a moment to gather your thoughts and formulate a solution to ensure a clear and effective response.
⚡️Example
Imagine this: A customer is upset about a technical glitch and demands a quick fix on live chat. How do you balance speed with accuracy to resolve the issue?
- Acknowledge the issue as quickly as possible and use empathy.
- Gather the necessary information.
- Stay calm and composed.
- Quickly assess the situation.
- Provide a clear solution or alternatives.
- Follow up to see if further help is needed before ending the chat.
7. Keeping Your Cool When Things Get Heated
How well you defuse a tense situation depends on your ability to manage your emotions. When you’re in the heat of conflict, staying calm and composed allows you to think clearly and respond thoughtfully instead of acting impulsively.
Managing your emotions can transform potentially volatile interactions into constructive conversations, resulting in better outcomes for everyone involved.
Start With This
Practice mindfulness techniques like deep breathing and visualization to keep calm during challenging interactions.
1) Deep Breathing
Slow, deep breaths can activate your body’s relaxation response, which directly counters the stress response. The most important thing to do is inhale and exhale slowly. The 4-7-8 deep breathing method can help guide your deep breathing exercises.
To practice deep breathing:
- Inhale slowly through your nose for 4 seconds.
- Hold your breath for 7 seconds.
- Exhale slowly through your mouth for 8 seconds.
- Repeat this several times until you feel more calm.
2) Visualization
Visualization is another excellent method for managing emotions and staying calm during stressful situations. This simple but powerful practice is also proven to reduce anxiety and depression.
To practice visualization:
- Close your eyes and imagine a peaceful place where you feel relaxed.
- Picture the interaction you’re about to have, seeing yourself responding calmly.
- Focus on how it feels to handle the situation to reinforce confidence successfully.
⚡️Example
For example, if an angry customer is pushing your buttons, how do you manage your emotions while handling the situation professionally?
- Pause and breathe to remain calm.
- Listen actively.
- Stay neutral.
- Acknowledge their feelings.
- Don’t take it personally.
- Focus on solutions.
- Set boundaries if needed.
- Reflect after the conversation to understand what worked and what didn’t.
Personalize the interaction. Address customers by name and customize responses to their needs for a friendlier, more personalized experience. To do this, support reps need real-time access to customer data.
8. Reframing the Conversation: Making Conflict Suck Less
Reframing is an effective way to get a conflict-driven conversation on track to a resolution. Using reframing, you can shift the conversation from frustration to resolution by de-escalating tension and redirecting the customer’s focus.
Start With This
By shifting your mindset, you can, in turn, change the customer’s mindset towards a resolution. Use language that turns the focus to solutions, like “What we can do moving forward is…” instead of dwelling on past issues.
⚡️Example
Let’s say a customer keeps returning the same complaint. How do you guide the conversation toward a solution and prevent a cycle of frustration?
- Shift your perspective on the situation from one of conflict to one of growth and understanding.
- Use positive language to reduce defensiveness and promote collaboration.
- Ask open-ended questions.
- Frame the issue collaboratively to show them you’re in it together.
- Take responsibility where appropriate.
- Practice active listening.
By following these steps, you can reframe conversations to be more constructive and collaborative.
9. Key Phrases & Scripts For Diffusing Tension
Having go-to phrases can help you maintain control and professionalism in challenging situations. Using the right words can de-escalate tension and create a more positive interaction.
Memorize These Key Phrases For Effective De-Escalation
- “I understand how frustrating this must be.”
- “Let me see how I can resolve this for you.”
- “I appreciate your patience while we work through this.”
Scripts For Handling Angry Customers
Here are scripts for handling angry customers in person, over the phone, email, and live chat.
1) In-Person
Scenario: A customer is visibly frustrated and raises their voice about a delay in service.
Script: “I’m so sorry for the wait. I can see how frustrating that would be. I appreciate your patience, and I’m here to make sure we get to the bottom of this. Let’s look and see what’s happening to find a solution together.”
2) Phone
Scenario: An angry customer calls in about ongoing billing issues.
Script: “I completely understand why you’re frustrated, and I truly apologize for the inconvenience. Let’s review the details to find a solution for you.”
3) Email
Scenario: A customer emails expressing disappointment with a critical bug in your product.
Script:
“Hello <customer name>,
I’m sorry to hear about the problems you’re experiencing with <product name>. I understand how frustrating it would be to encounter a defect like this. I’m here to make this right for you and get everything working as expected. Could you provide some additional details and steps to replicate this bug, as well as a screenshot, if possible? I’ll work with our team to make sure we find a solution. Thank you for your patience as we address this issue.”
4) Live Chat
Scenario: A customer on live chat is upset that their account hasn’t been upgraded as promised.
Script: “I apologize for the delay, and I can see how frustrating this can be. I’m looking into your account now and’ll update you shortly. Thank you for your patience as we work through this together.”
10. Turning A Crappy Situation Into A Positive Experience
Remember the service recovery paradox we mentioned above? Even angry customers can become loyal if you handle the situation carefully. You haven’t lost customers just because they’re angry; it’s an incredibly powerful opportunity to turn them into loyal brand advocates.
The Power Of Following Up
Go the extra mile with a timely follow-up. Following up after you’ve provided a resolution ensures you genuinely value the customer and care that they found a resolution. This also shows you’re committed to providing excellent service and continuously improving.
Bonus: After successfully handling an upset customer’s complaint, send a follow-up email thanking them for their patience and offering a discount on their next purchase.
From Tension To Trust
Business owners and support reps field inquiries from various channels, and you must be prepared to handle angry customers no matter where they are. By following these tips and using our scripts, you’ll be a step ahead of the game when diffusing upset customers.
With the right approach, these challenging moments can become powerful ways to strengthen customer relationships and foster a more resilient business. Listening actively, showing empathy, and resolving issues with care can turn a negative interaction into a positive experience.
Customer Support De-Escalation Checklist
- Clarify the problem: Understand the complaint to address it more effectively. If necessary, rephrase the customer’s words.
- Use a script: Reduce human error and control your heightened emotions by using a script written ahead of time.
- Re-read any written communications before sending: Make sure you’re being clear and kind.
- Memorize key phrases for phone chats: “Thanks for being so patient.” “I understand where you’re coming from.” “I’m going to resolve this for you, and I will let you know each step of the way.”
- Spot the signs of churn: If a customer starts to ghost you, or stops using your products or services, they’re at risk of churning. Try to win them back with friendly check-ins, offers for discounts, and 1:1 support.
- Follow up: Check in with a customer before, during, and after the issue has been resolved so that you know they are happy with the results and no longer angry.
Key Takeaways:
- Reframing Conversations: Shift focus to solutions instead of dwelling on past frustrations.
- Face-to-Face: Use body language to show empathy and maintain calm.
- Phone: Focus on tone and active listening to manage emotions.
- Email: Carefully craft responses to avoid misunderstandings and ensure clarity.
- Live Chat: Resolve issues quickly, keeping the tone professional and helpful.
- Emotional Management: Stay calm under pressure using mindfulness techniques.
Editor’s Note: This article is part of the blog series Run Your Business by the marketing team at Unitel Voice, the virtual phone system priced and designed for startups and small business owners.
